Tag: Loss

You Make Me Feel

There’s nothing in our world

But you and I

And feelings

Of love

That we have for each other

Used as currency

Of happiness

For the way you claim

I make you feel with a smile

Of togetherness

Because nothing here matters

Except us

But that’s because this is your fantasy

You can’t see past

Your insecurities holding you back-

A home made jail cell

Your negativity

Repelling me from your needs and desires

Criticizing me for the person I’ve become

When you remain unchanged

But most of all

Secluding me

And creating a rift

The biggest feeling of which

Is one of

Not belonging.

The Unexpected

It is cold

Dreary damp and dark

Nothing to keep me company

But the absence of

Your smiles as a tickle touches your sides

Brought from unexpected fingers

Your eyes as they stare deeply into mine

Telling each other secrets of their own

Your hand grasping mine

A lifeline holding me next to you

Grounded in our world

Your laugh as it sings melodies into the air

A tune I would often long to hear

You. Only a memory

That I can’t hold on to

Beyond this journey

From life to… The unexpected.

 

You’re alive while I’m here.

 

You are lost to me

But I”ll be here

Waiting for you to join me.

 

Greet you with

All the joys we once shared.

 

You will find me

And we will

Never be lost again.

 

Mother

She knows me

For she shows me

How I should be

How I could be.

 

And she’s caught me

And she’s taught me

What I could know

What I should know.

 

But here I am,

Alone, I am-

 

So I’ll cry (not for a lover)

For my mother.

Things Unsaid

There are many things I’d like to say to you

The fact that I was lying

To your face

For the majority of my life

That I loved you

And hated you

Equally and simultaneously

That I wished you were more

Than the man you thought you were

And would become the man you always dreamed of

And I want to

Be honest with you

For the first time in my life

Tell you that I care

About every hurtful word

You threw my way

And I would

Change the past

To change the future

And make the present right

But I can’t

Because

You’re

Not

Here.

http://www.napowrimo.net/

Fade Away

Cherubic smiles

Pinched pink blossomed cheeks

With springy hair

Amateur limbs

And inhibitions.

 

Slanted smiles

Red rushed rosy faces

While taming tangles

With experienced limbs

And imaginary invincibility.

 

Frowning

Gray

Lifeless

Flaccid

And Deteriorating.

 

Faces fading

Along with memories

Until nothing precedes you

And your soul succumbs.

Death Pact Angel of Orzhova

I stand on a concrete ledge

Staring at the ground below

My translucent tattered wings spread out behind me

Refracting light at all angles

That makes the alley beneath me glow

As it calls out to me

If you fall, I’ll be here to catch you.

 

My wings were strong once

And they would carry me on the lightest of winds

But I had fallen

Madly and deeply in love

For a man that couldn’t see my potential

And all that I could be.

He clipped my wings and made me his

But what have I had since then?

My immortality has caused me to lose my love

And now I’m forever lost.

 

I’ll have one last flight

One last chance to soar

And feel freedom kiss my cheeks.

 

These thoughts slowly push me closer to the edge

Until I let myself go.

This is my mental undoing, I think

As my body crumbles to pieces from the impact-

And although I can feel pain, I cannot ever truly die

So I will lie here with tattered wings and broken bones

Until someone finds me and patches me up

Only for me to try again.

Recipe for Disaster

One mistake that could have been prevented

But not easily fixed.

Stir until the bumps begin to smooth out.

Add a dash or glimmer of hope to taste;

Enough that it can still be crushed

But not enough to overpower.

Let sit until it ferments

And spreads

Sinking into the crevices in your brain

Leaving you with nothing

But an aftertaste

Of what could have been.

 

Set Fire

A woman

Left with no more hope

Said goodbye to the life she’s always known

Watching her memories burn

Creating her own path

With a blazing trail behind her

She set fire to her past

And told herself

To never look back.

Diminished

Time has progressed

But no wounds have healed

The pain that was hidden

Comes with a vengeance

Twisting needles in your spine

Twisting

And twisting

While you wither away

And slowly disintegrate

Until finally

You no longer

Exist.

Taken Away

You will not be taken away from me

Before a kiss is placed from your lips onto mine

A secret shared with nothing standing between us

Our secret language that holds more emotion

Than words could ever carry

Before your arms embrace me so tightly

Just like the day when we first met

When nothing could ever feel so right

Except for where we were at that moment

Before my eyes give away my weakness

And my fear of being alone

Without you

You will not be taken away from me

Before I get the chance to say goodbye.